Dib and Raven
by Agent S7
Summary: Invader Zim & Teen Titans Crossover. The insane story about a little bigheaded kid, a freaky psychic girl and an unholy alliance between an alien and a big red demonthing...Review for a free nonexistant taco!
1. Chapter 1

The Child with the Enormous Head Meets the Freaky Psychic Girl

By Secret7

Raven felt the psychic energy flow through her. The mystical powers of the mind were under her command. And yet, somehow, she sensed a danger looming. She closed her eyes harder, trying to ignore the nagging sensation that someone was watching her.

"Hey! Are you Raven?" said a voice.

Raven opened her eyes, and a wave of negative energy flew from behind her.

"Who are you?" she asked, her voice containing some anger.

The boy, who had an unusually large head, had glasses and brown-colored eyes. He wore a leather, black trench coat and a strange shirt with a smiley face that wasn't expressing any emotion. He also had a strange, freaky-lookin' haircut.

"The name's Dib. I"

"Are you another supervillian?" Raven asked, still annoyed.

"NO!" he shouted. "Of course not! Look, you've got to listen to me!"

"…How did you get in here?"

"Disabled the security. Now please, _please_ listen! The fate of the world is in the balance."

Raven closed her eyes. She obviously had to listen to this annoying teen until the other Titans came. She tried to remember the rule she was taught in Azerath: "Do not let your anger control you."

"Alright, I'll listen."

"Good! Now, you gotta listen carefully! It all started with Zim! You see, about a year back, I was on my house's roof when suddenly"

"LIES! LIES!" an even more annoying voice shouted. "I mean, he's lying."

A green kid walked up next to Dib. "Hi. I am **ZIM**!"

"He's the one!" Dib said frantically. "He's an _alien_!"

"Please excuse, poor, insane little Dib. He's crazy, you know," Zim added. "OBEY ME! I mean, I've heard of you. You're one of the Teen Titans, right?"

"Yes…" Raven said, slightly interested in whatever the heck was going on.

"Good!" Dib said. "He's an _alien_! He wants to rule this planet!"

A dog walked into the room. A _green_ dog.

"I like muffins," the dog said.

"That's his robot!" Dib shouted. "Don't you believe me?"

_Did someone slip some LSD into my herbal tea?_ Raven thought to herself.

"No, I don't believe any of you."

"Believe Master!" said the dog. "He's NIFTY! WAFFLES!"

Finally, Raven's anger took control. Two red eyes opened on her forehead. She screamed an unearthly scream and Zim, GIR and Dib hovered into the air.

"You will learn the true meaning of pain," Evil Raven said. "Prepare for your doom."

"I LIKES DOOM!" GIR shouted. A mistake, as his head popped off. "Aww Man! I likes me head!" he shouted.

Raven screamed, then fell to the ground. The eyes disappeared. Zim stared at Raven.

"Y'know, she's more scary than your sister," he pointed out to Dib.

Zim then quickly left the building, GIR in his arms.

"How did you _do_ that?"

Raven rubbed her head. It hurt like hell.

"You don't want to know."

"But…I do," Dib said, a little bit of sadness in his voice. "From what I've read, you feel like an outcast here. You scream at the top of your lungs and no one hears. I…I know what it's like."

Raven was silent.

"Listen. Please," Dib begged.

Raven smiled. "Tell me."

"It all started with Zim," he began…

End

(A/N: So? Good? Bad? Ugly? Should I continue it, or is it fine like it is? Feedback appreciated!)


	2. Chapter 2

(Author's Note: Yeah, I know this probably could be better, but it was the best I could think up. I'm sorry if I disappointed anyone…)

Part 2:

The "I Can't Think of a Good Title" Chapter!

"Arrgh!" Zim growled.

He had walked into his secret underground lair about 5 minutes ago, carrying GIR in his arms.

"I can barely believe that earthling child!" Zim shouted. "Those pathetic **humans!"**

GIR stared at Zim. "But…:sniff: what abouts my head?"

"Hmmm…I'll fix that later. For now I need to do some research on that Bird Child."

"Yea! She hot!" GIR said.

"Hmm…yes, I suppose she _is_ attractive to the Dib-worm. But that matters not. I need _more information¸ _GIR!" Zim said. He suddenly noticed something. A purple hair stuck to his clothes. "Hmmm…one of the bird-child's hairs!"

"But…um…Master…ain't that a plot hole? 'Cause me never seen you get near Raven or nothin'..."

"Silence, GIR! I must study this hair…studiously!" Zim shouted, preparing to analyze the DNA…

Dib was sitting at home, contemplating.

And stuff.

_Does Raven like me? Oh, she must! With my paranormal charm…heheheh…I'm irresistible!_

A thought occurred to him.

_I wonder…does my head _really _look that big?_

He walked down the stairs, passing his terrifying sister's room, and going down to the living room. Gaz was playing her GameSlave II, naturally.

"Gaz…do you _really_ think that my head looks big?"

"Your head will look broken if you don't let me play my game!"

"Um"

Dib backed off, walking back to his room.

As much as he knew about Raven, there were still so many questions. He turned on his computer, and began typing out a message:

**Swollen Eyeball,**

**MothMan needs info on the Raven,**

**MothMan**

He smiled. Soon, with Raven's help, he would make Zim so doomed that he wished that he'd…never been…doomed.

He really needed to work on the dramatic speeches.

Zim stared at the technical readouts, astonished.

"This is impossible!" he whispered. "She has untapped psychic ability!" He tapped some more buttons. "According to this…she isn't even _human_! Computer!"

"…uh…yeah?"

"Give me as much information on this 'Raven' being as possible! AND HURRY!"

"Y'know, I really don't like you."

"SILENCE!" Zim cried. He turned to GIR. "GIR!"

**"YES, MY LORD! (**I likes cheese!)"

"Go spy on the bird-child and her…friends," Zim declared.

Gir smiled. "Okey DOKEY!" he said, taking off.

_Yes…_ Zim thought to himself. _Soon my evil plan of DOOM will be completed, and I will reign some doom upon the doomed…people…or…whatever. I need a soda…_

**TO BE CONTINUED!**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Dib sat in his room, thinking. Who _was_ Raven, really? What was her past? He had the sudden urge to call her up, and decided on it. He dialed, waited for several seconds, then heard a voice:

"Hello. This is the Teen Titans Corporation customer service line. How may I help you?"

"Um…I would like to speak to Raven."

"OK…just a second."

Dib waited for a couple seconds, then someone else came on the line.

"Hello. This is Raven speaking, how may I help you?" came a heavily accented French accent.

"You're not Raven," Dib stated bluntly.

"Yes I am! Azerath, Metrion…uh…(what is it again?" he whispered.) "Zinthop!" he added.

"Where's the _real_ Raven?" Dib asked, annoyed.

"I _am_ the real Raven! They said I was crazy, but I _am!_ Mwaahah! Mwahahahahhhaah! Now they'll listen!"

"Uhhh…OK," Dib said, obviously a little freaked out.

Suddenly another voice came on the phone. "Hello?"

It was really her!

"Uh…hi Rave…I was…um…wondering if you could come to my house today. I need to tell you more about the alien menace that threatens this very planet as we speak!"

"…Sure. I'll be over soon."

* * *

5 Hours Later

Raven walked through the streets to a purple house.

_Is this really where he lives? Why did I even agree to this?_

Well, she considered, she _did_ need to know about any coming alien threats. And that was it…right?

She rang the doorbell.

After a couple seconds, it opened, to see a tall man of science who looked similar to Dib, but…weirder. But with a smaller head, of course.

"May I ask who this is, little girl?" he said.

"Uh…Raven. I'm one of Dib's friends."

"Fascinating! I didn't know my son had the _ability_ to make friends! I better write this down! Come on in!"

Raven looked at him strangely, then walked into the house. There was a girl sitting on the couch playing what looked like a GameSlave 2.

"Hey. Do you know where Dib is?"

"If you shut up, I'll tell you. He's in his room, reading about aliens and stuff. Like always."

"Yeah," Raven said, walking up the stairs. As she walked up, she could pick up an essence of loneliness emanating from the room. It was surrounding the area so much that she could even _taste_ it. (It tasted kind of like apple sauce.) And, for the first time, she realized how much that this big-headed kid really meant to her. He was a friend, and she had treated him badly. She walked into Dib's room, looking for him. He was sound asleep, after looking in "Cropcircles" magazine. Raven used her psychic abilities to gently wake him up.

"AHHHH! ZIM! I KNOW YOU'RE THERE!" he shouted at the top of his lungs. (It hadn't had the effect she'd hoped for.) "YOU WON'T GET AWAY WITH THIS! I—Oh. Hi Raven."

Raven waved feebly. Maybe this kid really _was_ crazy. But then, somehow, she believed him.

"Dib. Yesterday you said you had absolute proof of Zim being an alien. I'd like to see that proof."

"Yeah. Hold on, I'll get it…" Dib said, grabbing his laptop. He clicked a couple times, and a vast folder opened up, simply entitled "Invader Zim". Dib opened a small folder called "Video Footage", and clicked up a movie.

"Watch this," Dib said, gesturing to the laptop.

The video started with the camera moving through a bunch of leaves. There, standing next to a tree, was Zim and a robot, who looked sort of like the green dog Raven had seen earlier.

"Finally, GIR! We have this device, and we shall use it to rain DOOM upon our DOOMED enemies!"

"Aww man! I likes me enemies!" GIR said.

Suddenly the camera burst out of the bushes. Dib spoke:

"At last! I have Zim on tape! He is an alien! I have him on tape!" the camera moved to the person Raven recognized as Dib's sister—"I have you on tape witnessing it!"

Then the tape abruptly ended.

"What happened?" Raven asked.

"Nothing much," Dib admitted. "He just unleashed a couple of giant robots on me."

"And no one _noticed?_" she asked.

"Yeah. People here are kinda…not…that…smart. For an example, my Dad's idea of a world-altering invention is an atomic waffle-iron."

"I LIKE WAFFLES!" a voice shouted.

Raven and Dib glanced at each other, and looked out the window.

"It was GIR," Dib said. "He must've been spying on us. But why?"

"Maybe because he works for your mortal enemy?" Raven said sarcastically.

"Maybe…but still. I have a feeling there's more to this…"

* * *

"GIR! Did you complete your assigned mission?"

"**Yes, my master!** They like each other!" GIR said.

"With this information, and the DNA testing I've done, we will be able to use this to our advantage! Yes, GIR! The world will soon be ours!"

"Aww man! Master, do we always have to end with a cliffhanger?"

"What?"

"Nevermind! MONKINESS!"

To Be Continued


	4. Chapter 4

(OK, sorry for the lack of update, I've just had a busy month. You guys probably know _exactly_ what it's like. Man, I'm virtually starved for reviews, to be perfectly honest! Sorry for the long speech, it's just that I've missed writing so MUCH! Oh so very **much...)**

Chapter 4

Dib sat in Ms. Bitters's class, looking ahead, and occasionally glancing at his mortal enemy. Zim.

"He's green," Dib pointed out. "And he doesn't have ears or a nose." It was pointless, but he just felt like telling them again.

"You heard him on the first day of school!" Melvin said. "It's a skin condition!"

"We have no time for this, children," Ms. Bitters said. She hissed at the class, then slithered toward her desk. "There is a new extra-curricular activity that the principal has recommended. All of the popular people are going to it. It's called the Warriors of Dark Evil Bad Scary Not-good Doomy Badness."

"Doesn't that sound…evil?" Dib asked.

"School programs are _always_ evil, Dib," Ms. Bitters said. "Who wants to join?"

"Would joining this program, perhaps, allow me to become lord of humans?" Zim asked.

"You could become the club leader, Zim," Ms. Bitters suggested. "Everyone interested in joining report to the school gymnasium after school. Understood? Good. Now, scurry along, you pathetic children, to devour your daily mass of nutrient-food."

The lunch bell rang, and the pathetic children scurried off to devour their daily mass of nutrient-food.

"I just don't get it, Gaz!" Dib said, talking to his sister.

"What is there to get? It's evil, therefore it's cool."

"No it's not! It has to be stopped….whatever it is."

"Go away, Dib."

Dib sighed. Sole defender of Earth was a tough job. Well, there was someone else, but she wasn't there right now.

Raven woke up in a cold sweat. She hadn't even noticed that she had slept in. Oh well.

She climbed out of bed, putting on her robe. It had been a nightmare of spooky doom. A horrible, doomed nightmare of spooky doom. It had gone like this:

It had started with herself and Dib at the movies, watching "Signs", laughing hysterically at the ridiculous idea that aliens who were killed by water would try to invade a planet 70 of it. When suddenly a dark laughter had filled the theater. Four eyes had appeared on the screen, and suddenly everyone started to get sucked into them, like some horrifying vortex of impending doom. Dib shouted something incoherent, then flew backwards. Raven tried to use her telekinesis to bring him back to her, to her arms, yet it wouldn't work! She screamed, and a cruel voice murmured:

_"The Spawn has been discovered. At last I may be unleashed."_

Raven, after fully dressing herself, walked out of her room, glancing around. All of the other Titans were at school in their secret identities or something. She didn't have one, never had. It made her feel even more alone, and she finally decided on seeing Dib. She stared at the time: 3:05. She'd be late…

Dib, wearing his nifty trench coat and boats, walked out of the evil skool he was forced to go to. He took a big whiff of fresh air, and exhaled. It was the perfect day suddenly. Nothing could go wrong. Yet somehow…

He had the urge to walk in the school, and he followed it.

_Why not go to the meeting? It could help you spy on Zim…_ he thought to himself. _And soon HE will be the one who's doomed!_

As he walked down the stairs, he heard a familiar chant.

"Azerath Metrion Zinthos….

"Azerath Metrion Zinthos….

"Azerath Metrion Zinthos….

"Azerath Metrion Zinthos….

It wasn't Raven…was it? He walked down toward the gym, and saw Zim sitting in a circle. He looked about as dumbfounded as a flying monkey from Uranus on pot.

"We, the Mortals, whom Trigon created with his bare hands, summon thee!" Melvin shouted. "What does thoust need?" he asked, not actually knowing his olde English.

"**I need the Spawn**," a freaky-bad voice said.

"Okey Dokey…so when do we get to the part where we rule the world?" Zim asked casually.

"Soon…" Melvin says. "Once we get the one with the mark upon the head…"

It all came to Dib suddenly. It was Raven! The chant—the crystal on her forehead! Everything!

He had to warn her!

Little did he know that he was most utterly and completely wrong.

(Author's Note: Yeah, I know that this chapter wasn't as funny as most of them, but I had to fit in a lot of exposition and stuff. I hope you liked it, and I'm sorry that GIR wasn't in it. But, to make up for it:)

GIR: MUFFFIIIIIIINSSSS!


	5. Chapter 5

(A/N:I have finished this at last. I am warning you. This story gets stupid. REALLY REALLY stupid. If possible, stupider than Zim ever gets stupid. I like Invader Zim, but this story gets stupider, in a bad way. Or in a good way. HELL, I JUST DON'T KNOW ANYMORE!)

Chapter 5

Dib sprinted out of the skool, running as fast as he could. He looked backward, seeing a single kid pointing at him. His eyes widened, and his jacket flowed with the wind in a nifty sort of way.

He glanced around, to check if any cars were coming, then ran across the street, dodging a Ford Corolla.

"Hey…" the driver muttered. "That kid has a big head."

Dib dashed across the streets of the city, passing a donut shop. Little did he know that someone happened to be occupying that donut shop. One of his worst nemiseseses…nemeses…whatever.

He ran forward, and then spotted Zim. He was walking forward, with an evil look in his eyes.

"Hello, Dib. What do you think of my plan? Is it not **ingenious?**"

"You haven't even told me your plan!"

"Oh…you'll know my plan! My plan is so planny…so full of planness…so…ah, whatever." Zim leaped onto Dib, whipped out an Irken taser and knocked him out.

Out of nowhere, a psychic-formed raven appeared. Walking out of it was…

"Hey! You're that freaky psychic girl!" Zim pointed out.

"Did you just knock out Dib?" Raven asked, her voice annoyed.

"Uh no. Maybe. Let me think…"

WHAM

Raven was smacked in the neck with the taser…

Dib opened his eyes. He was in a dark sewer-like place, shackled to the wall. And, posted to the wall, was the big skool emblem thingy.

"I _knew_ there were secret passages under the school! And they didn't believe me!"

"HI!"

"…GIR?" Dib said quietly.

"Yeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaah?"

"Where's Raven?"

"She's in the big evil thangy! Right there!" GIR said, pointing out the door to the left.

"Could you let me go?" Dib said. The shackles were tightening.

"Um…what would Master do?"

"Uh…" That he couldn't answer.

"If you can reach this DONUT!" he said, pulling out a donut.

Dib stretched his arm forward, as far as he could. He missed. He tried again…once again, failing to grab the glazed snack of deliciousness…

Raven woke up tied to the wall, upside-down. Not usually your idea of comfort. She looked around quickly, noticing a group of the creepy, crazy kids staring at her.

"Spawn of Trigon!" Melvin said. "We are honored to have you here!"

"What are you doing? Where's Dib?"

"Dib? Are you talking about the child with the enormous head?" asked Melvin.

"His head's not _that_ big!" Raven admitted.

"It matters not. All we need is the moon in the right alignment, and we shall project a beam of moonlight onto your head. Once it reaches it, (which will be painfully slow like a secret agent movie), Trigon will be unleashed upon the earth!"

Raven struggled, then remembered her powers. She tried to break the chains, but to no avail.

"Haha! You fool! We gave you some magic potion thingy to negate your powers!" Melvin shouted. "You are _doomed_!"

Dib stood at the corner of the wall, GIR standing next to him.

"GIR…what are you doing here?"

"Waaaatchin' you." he said. He stuck his tongue out.

Dib just stared for several seconds. "Yeah…whatever." He took a bite out of his donut. "Now, I want you to cause a distraction. Can you do that for me?"

"Give me five buucks!"

Dib searched his pockets, and found a quarter, a long-dead Tomagotchi, and a piece of lint.

"Here," he said, holding them out. "Will this work?"

"HERE'S THE RANCID TUNA YOU WANTED!" he shouted, dumping tuna on Dib's head.

"What was that sound?" a voice shouted.

"Uh…thanks?" Dib said, unsure. The moment the cult member came in, he socked him in the face, and he collapsed.

"Well…that wasn't too hard," Dib muttered.

"I'm…still awake…" gasped the kid.

"Oh…sorry."

WHAM.

Dib walked into the ceremony chamber, wearing the kid's robes. He walked forward, glancing around. Zim was there, as well as Melvin and—Raven! The moonlight was getting closer and closer to her head.

He started to run, then the run turned to a sprint, then he jumped in front of the Raven blocking the moonlight with his enormous head. Dib grinned.

"HAH! You thought you could take over the world? Well guess what, Zim! At last, _I_ win! And you lose! Hahahhahahaaaa!"

Dib didn't even notice the large portal of DOOM forming from his head.

"So, Zim? What do you have to say for yourself?" Dib asked, staring at him. "Are you angry? Scared? I pity you! I...wait a second."

The portal opened fully, and a demonic voice filled the room.

**"SUFFER THE WRATH OF TRIGON!"** it screeched.

"Yay! I like wrath!" GIR shouted.

**TO BE CONTINUED!**


	6. Chapter 6

(Let the stupidity begin…)

Chapter 6

Dib was shocked at the enormous portal of evil projecting from his head.

"Well…that was surprising," he admitted.

"We're doomed," Raven said. "With Trigon coming to this dimension, the earth has no hope remaining."

"You never had _any_ hope, earth-human!" Zim cried. "As you can see, I will soon control the universe!"

"Zim, the events you've triggered are going to _end_ the universe!" Dib shouted over the increasing evil noise of dimensionalness coming from the portal.

"Eh, same difference. Now, BOW TO YOUR NEW RULER!"

**_"Dag nabbit! They just don't make these things like they used to!"_** Trigon shouted, trying to get through the portal.

"You jerk!" Dib shouted back. "If you destroy everything, there won't be anything left to destroy!"

"What about nothing?" Zim asked.

"You can't destroy nothing! IT DOESN'T EXIST!" Dib virtually screamed.

Zim's eyes widened. "But _I_ was the one who always wanted to rule the universe! It's been my dream ever since I was a squirming mass of goo!"

"Then how do we stop it?"

"He'll never tell you!" Melvin yelled. "Because he's on our side!" Some of the cult members nodded their heads evilly.

At that point, the portal sucked Melvin into Hell, where he, like Ms. Bitters predicted, turned into **nothing**!

"I'll tell you," Zim said quickly. "We need the rotting flesh of some…sacred…fish thingy."

"Great. Where are we going to find some rotting fish?" Raven muttered.

GIR grinned widely, his tongue sticking out. A putrid smell filled the room.

"GIR, what do you have?"

"Nooooooothing."

"Show me!"

"RANCID TUNA!" he shouted, and his head started to spin violently, the fish flying from his head all over the room, coating the inhabitants. And entering the portal.

There was an unearthly scream.

**_NO! I JUST CLEANED THIS JACKET!_**

The portal closed in a nifty explosion of energy, and there was silence.

Of course, until the obligatory CIA ninjas came in.

They leaped through the windows, sweeping up the tuna with Ninja skill, taking photos, and, finally, mopping the floor.

"You saw nothing."

"Wait a second! You're just going to cover this up?"

"It's happened in twelve states. We do this all the time, kid."

"What about the alien? Do you notice that kid with the GREEN SKIN? Huh? Huh? HUH?"

"Skin condition," Zim said.

"Just because he has a skin condition doesn't mean you can persecute him!" one Ninja shouted.

"Yeah! I've read up on you! You're crazy, you crazy big-headed child! Why, when _I_ was a boy, no one had a head that big! In fact--"

Dib unchained Raven, ignoring the Ninja.

"You alright?"

"I'll be fine," Quoth the Raven.

The two teleported away to Dib's house…

To be finished and stuff.

(EXPLANATION: The reason I haven't updated for so long can be described with two words: writer's block. Oh how I loathe it. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed that chapter which I found insanely stupid. Oh well. FEEDBACK APPRECIATED:D )


	7. Chapter 7

Author's…Thingy:

To be honest…I never thought this story was that good. Nor did I ever dream that it would get so many readers! Thanks everybody, esp. to: Metal Overlord 2.0, Mad Mauser, "yo mama", miz-12376, Invader Iza, Wilma Wonka, Invader H.I.S.S., ravenfairie, DibMagician, invader Shannon, irken OO8, Almighty Tallest Angie, HVK, InvadingAngel, SpiderSquirrel, Dibsthe1, NoOne You Know, H-Dog, Plunderer01 and mikomikonurse. Thank you for reading this astronomically silly story! MAY YOUR TUNA REMAIN FRESH!

Read on for…

Chapter 7: In Which You Read A Crappy Ending

It had been about a week since the incident with Trigon, and everything had gone back to normal.

Pretty much.

Raven trudged out of her room, extremely tired. She had had an odd week with Trigon's declaration of invasion, the weird Skool Cult, the big head portal...it was all really wearing her out.

The sound of the doorbell rang throughout the Titans' Tower. Raven got up from her book of "Johnny the Homicidal Maniac" to go answer it.

"Hello?"

Towering over her was an unspeakable terror. Her and her hero teams' long time archnemisis with one eye and a cold, unfeeling mask. His remaining eye glared at her cruelly and the demonic rune on his mask glowed brightly, filling the room with unspoken terror.

"Oh. Hi, Slade."

The looming figure squinted his one, burning red eye under his mask. "How dare you speak my name with such carelessness!"

Raven yawned. "Look…I'm a little tired. Could you come back _later?"_

"I'm sorry."

There was a long, awkward silence.

"…what?"

Slade continued. "I'm sorry for believing that you were really the daughter of Trigon just because you were a gothic, disturbed teenager with demonic powers, a pale face and a taste for human _fleeeeeeessssssshhhhh_."

"But I don't have a taste for human--"

"What I'm trying to say is that you aren't the daughter of Trigon. I apologize on behalf of him and I would really like to apologize myself. I mean, I've been a real jerk lately and--"

"You're evil. It's kinda your job."

The horrifying figure ignored her foolish words and opened his mouth, his dark, foreboding voice pervading the room. "I bought you some beef jerky as a consolation prize. Happy?"

"Uh…sure. Slade…have you gone insane recently?"

Slade shook his head, a genuine freakiness beginning to enter the room. "Oh…you thought the events of the last few weeks were terrible? Wait and see. Wait and see…" Slade turned and began to walk out the door. Unfortunately he had forgotten that it was closed and slammed his head into it. "Er…forget you ever saw that." He then fumbled for the switch and opened it, cursing to himself the whole time.

"Okay…what was that?"

Dib had been researching in the library, looking up any and every book on demonology possible. He had read many fear-inspiring tales of the occult that would make your spine tingle, such as the tales of old gods that could drive you mad by looking into your eyes, maggots that infested the soul and eventually turned the victim into nothing more than a shell, and even a chilling account of Hulk Hogan's acting career.

He put down the book and sighed. Nothing. No new information about Trigon or his spooky servant people.

He picked up the next one, and looked at the cover. That was odd…there was four eyes on it. He opened the book, and looked through. This was it, he realized. It had a prophecy of all of the events of the last few weeks! And even longer! There was something about "The Meeting of the Extraterrestials". And bologna? And what was this about horrible nightmare visions? A deep sense of foreboding filled Dib's freakishly large head. Something was wrong. This wasn't about Raven…

Then he saw the diagram of the Spawn of Trigon.

He had a head so big that you could probably build a skyscraper on it. A jet of black hair sat on it, part of it spiked up and then forward. An indifferent face was on his T-shirt, and he wore a long-flowing trenchcoat.

"No…NO! It was me all along! Oh GOD! The trauma! The shock!"

He looked again at the diagram.

"…Well. I didn't see this coming. Damn…I need a soda."

Right when he was about to walk off, his eyes widened in horror at the sight of the diagram.

"Wait a minute…is my head really that big?"

The End

(now's the part where you review)


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